Friday, October 06, 2006

PULL OVER BOYS!!!

PULL OVER BOYS!!!

Information Highway Patrol:

Well boys…the reason I pulled you all over here off the Information Highway is I witness you talking out of the left side of your mouth without signaling. You all were exceeding the posted word speed limit too. You boys are a bunch of fast talkers now aren’t you? Journalistic license and Reality Registration please….

Havanaban:

Yes officer but I wasn’t talking out of the left side of my mouth…just whistling Dixie is all. Here’s my license

Information Highway Patrol:

Did you realize your Journalistic license privileges have been suspended for 47 years?

Havanaban:

There must be some mistake officer.

Information Highway Patrol:

No mistake about it son. You in a heap a trouble boys. Keep your hands on the keyboard where I can see ‘em.

Havanaban:

This is all just a misunderstanding sir.

Information Highway Patrol:

We’ll just see now won’t we boys. I’ve done called your information into headquarters. Where’s your Reality Registration boys?

Havanaban:

Ah, we seem to have misplaced reality sir.

Information Highway Patrol:

Misplaced Reality! Boys you are in a heap of trouble. Don’t make no sudden moves boys while your record comes across my screen. Good Lord Almighty! Boys…it says here you all been lying for 47 years! What ya got to say about that?

Havanaban:

There must be some mistake sir. We’ve been framed by this big gringo guy who’s out to get us.

Information Highway Patrol:

Yeah son…did this gringer fella tell you boys to jail and torture people just for speakin’ their minds?

Havanaban:

No officer that was all done legally….

Information Highway Patrol:

LEGALLY! Boys don’t you all know nothing about the Information Highway? You can’t do that to people and get away with it these days, son. Says here you boys have even executed thousands of people just for not thinking like you boys think. Yep…you all in a heap of trouble.

Havanaban:

What’s going to happen to us officer?

Information Highway Patrol:

Well for starters I’m gonna have to revoke your credibility.

Havanaban:

Isn’t that a bit extreme sir? We were just out trying to have a little fun is all.

Information Highway Patrol:

You call this record of deceit a little fun? You boys just don’t get it now do ya? Yep! I’d say you boys are dumb as rocks but that wouldn’t be fair to a good number of rocks now would it?

Havanaban:

We didn’t mean any harm sir.

Information Highway Patrol:

Is that why you shot people against a wall just for speaking their mind? Keep your hands off the keyboard boys. Says here that at this very minute you boys are engaged in a propaganda campaign to cover up the enormous dengue fever outbreak in Havana. All just to sucker some tourists into coming and parting with some of their dollars.

Havanaban:

That’s not exactly correct. We’re spraying….

Information Highway Patrol:

Son...I haven’t seen you boys laying around in short sleeve shirts enjoyin’ the Havana evenings in your front yard. You know dang well there is a huge outbreak! You know what propaganda is boy?

Havanaban:

Sir?

Information Highway Patrol:

It’s trying to convince someone of something you don’t believe yourself. Yep…you boys in a heap a trouble now. Now ya done it boys. I'm gonna have to put a world wide alert on you boys. Anyone harmed by you boys can file their complaint right here and recommend your punishment in cyberspace. Your credibility is hereby revoked!

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